


Can we keep It?

by Weresnake



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Angst, Crack AU, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2019-10-07
Packaged: 2020-11-26 15:11:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20932283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Weresnake/pseuds/Weresnake
Summary: “I-” Richie starts in a stage whisper as they begin the hasty meeting. “-am in favor of possibly adopting It. Think of all the cool shit we can do with Pennywise at our side, it’d be sick!”“We-we are NOT adopting this… this-““Clown spawn?” Richie offers,“Infant jester?” Eddie counters,“Face eating space grub?” Ben adds, and Beverly wheezes from how hard she’s laughing.Bill throws his hands in the air, abandoning the secrecy. “What-the-fuck ever! I don’t want to be anywhere near the thing that killed Georgie, ok?! If you want to get yourselves murdered adopting It than be my guest.”0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0OBabywise au where instead of dying from the kids growing unafraid of it, Pennywise de-evolves into babby which then the kids adopt begrudgingly. Then the fun begins.





	Can we keep It?

**Author's Note:**

> Thank Bradley @ https://twitter.com/BradBradleyArt for this au bc this is their babywise au that i was inspired enough to write for them. :D  
Expect a chapter more or so btw

In the dark depths of the cavern, the losers club slowly circle Pennywise the dancing, murderous clown and corned so that it couldn’t escape if it tried. As Bill raises his weapon, the monster mutters incoherently. With his back to the wall the clown seemed to be going through a whirlwind of different plots to squirm away and escape until its face freezes, then contorts. Just like that, the group of children watch in surprise as Pennywise shrinks into the size of a toddler with noodle arms and big watery eyes. 

Bill lowers the pipe in his hands in surprise as the shapeshifting monster begins blubbering comically. 

Richie treads up close beside the leader of their little gang. “Hey, what-?” 

The clown erupts into tears. The kids do their best to keep their menacing expressions but they give to each other awkward glances. 

Mike, tired of the monsters antics, steps forward with a hastily found weapon of his own to land a killing blow at the clown but he too falters as the wailing gets more pathetic.  
“Uh…” 

“Are you sure there isn’t a second weakness of it? Like maybe a bucket of water to dump to make it melt like the wicked witch.” Richie grouses as he walks up cautiously and pokes at the sobbing clown, forgetting the inherent danger of prodding a monster that enjoys taking bites out of humans. 

“Rich! Get the fuck behind me. Its still dangerous!” Mike yells out of panic. 

Richie keeps poking and is delighted to find out that poking Pennywises nose does in fact produce a honking sound. “Relaaax, Its too big of a bitch to hurt anyone now. See?” 

The clowns sobbing dies down but the sheer look of despair still frames its face. 

“Your f-funeral then.” Bill retorts but moves just beside Richie to get a closer look. 

“Please don’t kill meeee” Pennywise utters in a shaky voice. “I am just a lost, hungry clown with no one to teach me right from wroooong.” 

“I’m sorry but what part of eating live children didn’t ping you as a bad thing to do?” Beverly pipes up while crossing her arms. The clown pulls out a red handkerchief and blows loudly. Now covered in snot, he sets it aside tentatively and sniffles. 

“If you let me live I won’t eat children anymore.” It says miserably. “Pinkie promise! Cross my heart and hope to die! All the swears I can think of, just let me live.” 

Bill feels a tug at the collar of his shirt so when he turns he notices the urgent look Stan gives him and the others. “Group huddle, now.” 

Pennywise cocks its head in interest as it watches the children move away from it and crowd together to talk in hushed whispers. Its expression was free of any remorse or despair but the red stripes on its face were smudged from the waterworks. 

“I-” Richie starts in a stage whisper as they begin the last-minute meeting. “-am in favor of possibly adopting It. Think of all the cool shit we can do with Pennywise at our side, it’d be sick!”  
“We-we are NOT adopting this… this-“

“Clown spawn?” Richie offers,

“Infant jester?” Eddie counters,

“Face eating space grub?” Ben adds, and Beverly wheezes from how hard she’s laughing. 

Bill throws his hands in the air, abandoning the secrecy. “What-the-fuck ever! I don’t want to be anywhere near the thing that killed Georgie, ok?! If you want to get yourselves murdered adopting It than be my guest.” 

The laughing stops as they notice Bill isn’t enjoying any of this. In fact, he’s visibly shaking. Stan looks directly at him and reaches out to touch his arm but Bill snaps away. 

“You can make P-Pennywise your ugly mascot for the Lo-osers club for all I care, but I’m d-dem-dem-“ Bill hits his head with both hands. “Damnit. I’M LEAVING.” 

“Bill-“ Eddie says as he watches Bill storm off. A silence falls over the cavern as shame burns in every one of them for taking this so lightly and forgetting why killing Pennywise was so important to Bill. None of them really meet the others eyes despite the silent question hanging over the group for who should follow him. 

Stan finally growls something and heads out of the cavern. Just before disappearing from view, he turns to them and points at Pennywise, “keep it under a tight leash. I’ll comfort Bill.” 

They nod numbly, and all eyes then turn to Pennywise. The clown strides up in a yellow raincoat and bright red galoshes. At seeing the kids faces scrunch up in disgust, the clown gives a smile with fake innocence tightly laced in. “What? I just wanted to keep dry…” 

Richie adjusts his glasses and leans so that his eyes meet the clowns directly. “You’re on thin ice, Bozo. If you want to be a good clown, then your gonna have to follow some ground rules. Capice?”  
“Yessir!” Pennywise gives a mock salute so hard it almost topples back. 

Mike gives Richie an unsure look. Richie straightens up and crosses his arms. “Lets continue this at the fort, shall we? There’s a lot of basic shit we need to cover first and foremost.” 

Eddie scratches his head. “I really don’t like this Trashmouth.” He says as he hangs by Richie. 

“Nonsense! We’ll be the best clown parents there ever was, what do ya say Eds, ready to be a dad to a shapeshifting clown with an odd diet?” 

Ed flusters up. “Don’t call me that…” He stammers back quietly. 

“I can’t WAIT to learn nice things.” Pennywise throws its arms up in the air that then snake around its torso with an impossible amount of elasticity. “Say, will I get to go to school with you all when classes start again? Maybe I could disguise myself as a fellow student and go to the same classes so I could learn more about being nice.” 

The other losers gawk at the possibility (and the mental image of tiny Pennywise in school attire with a heavy backpack to lug around to boot) as Eddie manages to choke on air in shock. 

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there, but first we need to go over the basics.” Beverly says with a forced smile. 

“Yipee! I cant wait!” Pennywise says as It crawls out with the rest. 

This was going to be a looong end of summer.

**Author's Note:**

> Up next: 
> 
> A face splitting smile erupts upon Pennywise's face as it sees Mike wheel out a large poster featuring a poorly drawn diagram of the clown itself. His face is as stern as he can manage while pretending to be the mentor. Just as he opens his mouth, Richies hand bolts into the air.  
"Yes?"  
"Will there be a quiz after this?"  
".....No...."  
"Thank fuck."  
Mike rolls his eyes as the others snort. The clown gives a forced "HAHAHAHA" which silences them fairly quick. 
> 
> "Right," Mike says. "Pennywise? This is you." He points at the drawing, then traces the border of red running horizontal of the diagram. "This is your badness level, its unusually high for someone your size."
> 
> The redness level of the diagram runs so far up that theres hardly a sliver thats unfilled. Pennywise scribbles notes on a notepad furiously with its tongue sticking out the side.


End file.
